There once lived three sisters whose parents decided it was time to call it quits. So they did what they always said they would do and called it an early retirement moving back to the land from which they came…which happened to be a tiny island a 24+ hour trip via plane and boat away.
During this time, the oldest sister lived in NYC, the middle called Phoenix home…and the little was in a small town in Ohio.
Growing up the three sisters had to always rely on each other because Dad’s work would take them all over the place. Transition was the norm and friends would come and go with each move, but they always had each other.
So when their parents left, they decided to do what they only knew to do during big transitions, stick together.
They met up in Ohio, and proceeded on to the long road trip across the country with a shady motel thrown in for good measure along the way.
From the Midwest to the Southwest, they would settle into a beautiful home in sunny Scottsdale.
A month after buying their humble abode, they did the next natural thing by adding the sweetest addition to their family. They adopted a Golden Retriever named Olaf…and based on his curious nature, he was endearingly given the middle name of George.
Nine months or so later, the big sister would realize Scottsdale wasn’t a good fit and move on to L.A.
Olaf George would make visits to see her there.
And go everywhere he could…LGO was his favorite hot spot.
After seven years, they would sell their cozy home and the two sisters that remained would go separate ways…and Olaf would reside with the middle sister…only for the three to be together again a year later.
And then, the middle sister would move to Colorado with the plan to get settled and come back for Olaf. So as heart-wrenching as the good-bye was, she knew they’d be back together again…
But instead, a year and a half later, Olaf and the little sister were seeing the middle sister off as she hopped on a plan to move to Japan indefinitely…
So FaceTime became the greatest thing…And on a visit home from afar, Olaf would be the first one ready and waiting to greet the middle sister upon her arrival…What a gift technology was to allow for the middle sister to be a part of moments like this upon returning to Japan…
The middle sister knew Olaf was getting old in age and would pray to not bear the weight of his loss while abroad…and much to her surprise, she returned to the desert.
Nearly four years later and just three months ago, the middle, little and Olaf were reunited under one roof again…and within two months, Olaf moved on…
Words escape me to fully articulate what a gift Olaf was. I’m so grateful for his presence and love in my life all these years. I’m so grateful for how he became a precious bond between three sisters.
I asked God to let me be alongside him in his final days and they were really good days together…so for this I’m especially grateful.
Yet, loss is hard. I’ve wept more than I can handle. And when I can’t handle it, potato chips, chocolate, and endless scrolling through Facebook and Instagram help me cope.
I know there is so much grace in the grief.
I also know that the loss is causing unresolved grief to surface, and the emptiness felt is also attaching itself to other things, namely my singleness.
But it’s all good because it’s all part of the process. And I’m in it wholeheartedly like never before.
Last night, I spent four hours and a few glasses of wine in a most beautiful conversation with my best friend chatting about everything under the sun in our crazy, wild, beautiful and painful lives as we know them.
I pleaded with Jesus on behalf of her, and she pleaded for me…with full hearts, we expressed our gratitude and with the same breath, our confusion…
When life is not your own, it’s beautiful but it can definitely be confusing. And I’m learning more and more to be good with that…I don’t want it all figured out…
His ways are so much higher. I mean seriously, who am I to know the ways of the Creator of the Universe?
And while I may not understand His ways and strive to stop trying to…I know His Heart and it is good. It’s so so good.
In my confusion, He meets me and covers me with His Love. I know that without a shadow of doubt because I experience it over and over and over again.
His Love is everything to me.
For your shame ye shall have double; and for confusion they shall rejoice in their portion: therefore in their land they shall possess the double: everlasting joy shall be unto them. Isaiah 61:7